{"id":289,"date":"1999-01-06T08:53:17","date_gmt":"1999-01-06T13:53:17","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/blacknell.net\/dynamic\/1999\/01\/06\/big-ol-jet-airliner\/"},"modified":"2007-03-20T08:59:28","modified_gmt":"2007-03-20T13:59:28","slug":"big-ol-jet-airliner","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/blacknell.net\/dynamic\/1999\/01\/06\/big-ol-jet-airliner\/","title":{"rendered":"Big Ol&#8217; Jet Airliner"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Delta Flight 578 touched down at National Airport about 10 minutes late, and the guy in 2A was the last one off the plane.<\/p>\n<p>~<\/p>\n<p>It&#8217;s the end of my high (and more importantly- free) flying days. I&#8217;m figuring it&#8217;s been nearly a quarter million miles flown since 1990.\u00c2\u00a0 In that time, I&#8217;ve learned a lot of things:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>You don&#8217;t need to show up at the gate till 10 minutes before the flight.<\/li>\n<li>Never, ever, ever check luggage.\u00c2\u00a0 With a bit of planning, anyone can live out of a pull along for up to a week and look good.<\/li>\n<li>Pleasant words and a sincere smile for flight attendants pay off in the most unexpected ways.\u00c2\u00a0 Payoff or not- be nice.\u00c2\u00a0 They deserve it.<\/li>\n<li>It&#8217;s very easy to get very drunk very quickly at 32,000 feet.\u00c2\u00a0 If it&#8217;s not a trans-oceanic segment- count your drinks.\u00c2\u00a0 Test it by how you feel, and you&#8217;re probably going to end up ripped.<\/li>\n<li>Virgin Airlines Upper Class is the ideal way to get across the Atlantic.\u00c2\u00a0 Skilled massages, 30 movies, and full sized couches make it more comfortable than hanging out at home.<\/li>\n<li>Don&#8217;t joke with customs.\u00c2\u00a0 At all.<\/li>\n<li>Small children may be cute.\u00c2\u00a0 They may be charming.\u00c2\u00a0 They should be at the other end of the plane.<\/li>\n<li>Make good use of the aromatherapy mists available in the overnight kits they pass out.<\/li>\n<li>Avoid Dallas-Fort Worth at all costs.\u00c2\u00a0 National has been a blessing.<\/li>\n<li>You can&#8217;t carry handcuffs on international flights.\u00c2\u00a0 But the flight attendant will hold them for you, giving you a smile that makes even the shameless embarrased.<\/li>\n<li>It&#8217;s better to take an inconvenient flight and get business class than sit in [r\/c]oach.<\/li>\n<li>Free and easy flights create a social network that has nothing to do with where you live.\u00c2\u00a0 While you&#8217;ve still got free and easy flights- no problem.\u00c2\u00a0 When you take that away, it&#8217;s not so great.<\/li>\n<li>Little things like getting a gate assignment closest to the arrival\/departure curb makes a huge difference.<\/li>\n<li>You can fly Atlanta to Gatwick, get the Thameslink to St. Pauls, have breakfast and a bit of shopping in London, and catch the flight back in time to get to bed.\u00c2\u00a0 Early, even.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>So, those are a few of the things I&#8217;ve learned.\u00c2\u00a0 Of course, I&#8217;ll have a few opportunities to develop these lessons later this year.<br \/>\nInterviews will necessitate a few domestic flights.\u00c2\u00a0 I&#8217;ve also got some travel ambitions, which I&#8217;m sure I can make on the summer off-season.\u00c2\u00a0 Of course, I&#8217;m convinced that mentioning that dooms them now.\u00c2\u00a0 One used to be Constantinople.\u00c2\u00a0 Think that counts?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Delta Flight 578 touched down at National Airport about 10 minutes late, and the guy in 2A was the last one off the plane. ~ It&#8217;s the end of my high (and more importantly- free) flying days. I&#8217;m figuring it&#8217;s been nearly a quarter million miles flown since 1990.\u00c2\u00a0 In that time, I&#8217;ve learned a [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_exactmetrics_skip_tracking":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_active":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_note":"","_exactmetrics_sitenote_category":0,"ngg_post_thumbnail":0,"activitypub_content_warning":"","activitypub_content_visibility":"","activitypub_max_image_attachments":4,"activitypub_interaction_policy_quote":"anyone","activitypub_status":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[2,5],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-289","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-personal","category-travel"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/blacknell.net\/dynamic\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/289","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/blacknell.net\/dynamic\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/blacknell.net\/dynamic\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blacknell.net\/dynamic\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blacknell.net\/dynamic\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=289"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/blacknell.net\/dynamic\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/289\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/blacknell.net\/dynamic\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=289"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blacknell.net\/dynamic\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=289"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blacknell.net\/dynamic\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=289"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}